What the crap does that mean? I've not a clue. It starts out pretty cut and dry but then gets into a territory that could be good or terribly bad. I sang this in an eighth grade choir concert. My teacher was Mrs. Damaska. I couldn't stand her. She was one of those people that was happy ALL the time, and I just assumed that no one was really like that. But she was...even when I was terribly mean to her. Sorry, Mrs. Damaska. Sometimes I realize that as a kid I was really awful, and even though I knew it as I was doing it, I just couldn't help myself.
All that being said, I think of that song when I think of being happy. Not that I was happy when I sang it all those years ago; I was actually rather pissed that my mother INSISTED I be in choir, yet again. However, I remember Mrs. Damaska yelling: "Smile, People! Smile! This was the 60's! People were happy!" (Read: High).
And oddly enough, I've been really, really happy lately. (No illegal drugs involved at all, promise). When I wake up in the mornings I have that feeling that everything is right with me...with the world. You'd think that I would be grateful. And I am...but It's scary, too. When things are so great, there is just so much more to lose.
In the mornings I wake up and feel so content and grateful and it's kinda wonderful. It's a bazillion different things that have come together and meshed in the most perfect of ways. It's being married to my best friend,
it's having a daughter that's turning into a beautiful young woman that amazes me everyday (the middle one, fyi),
it's having a son that is kind and wonderful and hilarious,
it's having a baby that tries my patience and then melts my heart in equal parts all day long.
And it's my house, and it's my yard, and it's being here, and it's feeling like I'm home and I'm an adult.
I've been making goals, and following through. I've been trying new things, things I swore were impossible for me, and a waste of my time. But now...I kind of just, can do anything. Okay, maybe that's just a little over the top, but I've just felt so great. Hopefully I'm not jinxing myself. Anyway, school starts tomorrow. This makes me a little less happy, but I've hope for this new school year, and I pray that Riley and Cole will meet good friends, and enjoy their teachers. If I had a hammer, I'd probably just try to hammer a nail in the wall to hang a picture. And then it would be crooked, because that's how I always do it. But, I'd be happy with it, anyway. And I think that's pretty good for 2010. Right?
12 comments:
I am so glad that your so happy Rainey. It is a great feeling. Send some over my way. I don't know why but I have had a little bit of anxiety lately. However, I too am grateful for my new house and my kiddies and great hubby. Without them I know I would be even less happy and totally and completly lost.
seems like this new house has really opened up a lot of windows for you. you seem to have really accomplished a lot. i love it!
How do you remember Mrs. Damaskas yelling that at us. I just remember hating her. But speaking of former teachers. Do you remember Mr. Stafford? Man I had a crush on him. I remember asking him how gay people have sex. He either told me wrong or I heard wrong because for a long time a had a bizarre idea of how it happened. Anywho, today's my due date and this kid won't come out. Now I feel your pain.
typo's galore. sorry. (me not you)
Way to go Rainey! I'm happy you're happy.
Which school did they end up going to?
I am so glad you are finding joy in everything. That is a good way to be, will you please find a way to bottle some of that and give it to me. thanks!
NO ONE MENTIONED THAT "If I Had a Hammer" was the name of an episode from Dexter Season 4?!?! I'm surprised at you all! Just finished it btw. :) Don't worry... my lips are sealed.
MR. STAFFORD!!! OMG! Leah, I was JUST telling my husband last night that I had a 7th grade science teacher that we all thought was HOT and couldn't remember the name! Ha, ha!
I'm so glad you're happy, Rain. That's all I want for my "sibs." And now, that's all I want for my little nieces and nephews too. Love ya!
Mrs. Dumb-Ass-ka. I couldn't stand her, and I'm pretty sure that wasn't real happiness. I think she was addicted to prescription drugs and had a flask hidden in that piano. Pretty much, I think she was just a plain old bitch. And LEAH!! hahahaha! I totally remember Mr. Stafford telling us how gay people had sex, and let's just say, he was WRONG. WTF?!
But on another note, I am so glad that you have such a wonderful life, and I certainly hope nothing comes along to usurp your mojo. You're used to crappy things happening and throwing you off kilter, but I swear, life can be fantastic and happy and worry free. If I could work magic, I'd make sure it stayed that way for you for a long, long time. Loves!
Being happy is definitely the way to go. In all things. I honestly wish it to all my family and friends, and appreciate those that wish it of me.
Leah? I feel YOUR pain. I'm sorry she's refusing to come out when you want her to. I'm sending "GET OUT, BABY!" vibes your way, and hope the ordeal runs as smoothly as possible. And quickly. I do remember Mr. Stafford...and I had a crush on him, as well. I don't remember the gay sex question and answer, though. Maybe I wasn't there, or maybe I thought that what he said made perfect sense. Or as much sense as any of our genetics/reproductive chapters could make sense to me. I can tell you how to make the baby...but the whole probability part of whether it will have this or that eye and hair color is completely lost on me. I like to just find out, eventually. Like most un-intelligent people.
Kory--the kids are going to Canyon. More on that, later.
And Muff? I want that for you, too. And you could make me even MORE happy if you knitted me something...like you did for all your other friends. ;)
Moriah--remember when we'd talk about Mr. Stafford's wife? And how we couldn't believe he was so in love with her because she wasn't that "hot"? My goodness. Eighth grade is the beginning of the end.
Rain, you have a lot to be happy about. Your husband is the most creative person I know, your new home is beautiful, and your kids are the sweetest and they're all lookers (watch out!). It's important that you remember those things and tell yourself everyday how lucky you really are. Life's too short to be sad and not appreciate all you have. Love you.
Ahhh such a sweet post!!! I am catching up as usual. That picture of Cole really captures his personality. And about the cooking... I love your cooking. Do not use Andersons as testers. They are all dysfunctional eaters. Of course I don't mean me :) but seriously if I used them as a judge for my cooking I would have given up a long time ago.
Love what you are doing with the house, so exciting! Makes me want to go buy paint!
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