Thankful for...

I have been out of commission lately.  My computer took a turn for the worse, and it was beyond dead.   It wouldn't even start.  And all my programs were dead.  I guess I didn't realize how much I used it until it was dead.  Luckily, I had my iPhone and such.  But I've decided that regardless of how much I love my phone, having to zoom in, and scroll down every two seconds puts me in a bad mood, and makes me give up.  (Sad life, right?)
Anyway, on Saturday I went out and did yard work.  Mowing, and pruning trees in late November in Utah seems a bit funny, I'm sure.  Especially since it looked like the sky was going to open up and pelt me with snow.  However, it held out and waited to do all its dumping till Sunday, and meanwhile, I got most of our leaves put in the trash cans and made our yard soooo pretty.  While I did that, Jeff was detoxing my computer.  After like, 16 hours of removing, and cleaning and stripping it down to its original settings, it works better than I ever remember.  So big thanks to Jeff.  He did what I thought was impossible.  It had gotten to the point where I would turn it on, and wait ten minutes to even have the OPTION to go online.  And maybe you think this is boring? But let me tell you...when you have to go without, you realize how important everything is.  And I got to thinking about this.  Because, it works with other stuff, too.  And as shallow as it sounds, it took something like this to make me realize  I need to be more thankful.

My half-brother is going to be deployed on Tuesday.  Perhaps.  I specify half brother, because if I just said my brother, everyone would ask me when Jessey joined the military.  He went to Iraq a few years ago...and I guess it's time again.  Right before Thanksgiving.  I said "perhaps", because he's been told a few different dates.  Had to quit his current job, and just wait for someone to tell him when to get on the plane, meanwhile trying to prepare himself and his family for the day he has to go.  It makes me sad.  And then there's his family.  I think  I'm sad and worried.  And I really have no idea.  When I talked to him about it, he seems upbeat--willing to see the positive.  His family supports him, and realize that that's the way of life...but to me, it's such a long time to be without your best friend, husband, father.  I can't imagine.  I'm so grateful to have my husband here.  To know that he won't get some call to go away for some untold time.  There are people that adjust, and handle it.  And live their lives.  I'm thankful for them, and for their bravery.  And I'm thankful that I'm not expected to be that brave.  

This year is my "Siblings" Thanksgiving.  I'm excited to be able to host it at my home.  In all honesty, I hope one day to see Shelly and Jayson at this function, too.  It would be really nice to get to know them better.  Lora won't be able to make it.  And this is completely understandable, because I know what it's like to drive through Wyoming at this time of year.  It's scary and unpredictable.  And after being caught in a snowstorm with Muffy and Jeff and a baby Riley for 16 hours, I know it's just not something to be messed with.  We'll miss her, but I'm certain she'll have an enjoyable holiday with her husband and perhaps his family.  In a way it's been nice to take control and fix an entire meal.  Well, the siblings help, of course.  But I mean, there's something about fixing a holiday meal that makes me feel more like an adult.  That I can do something that for as long as I can remember, seemed to be only for "ladies".  Old ladies.  And speaking of that, I found my first gray hair last week.  Well, the first gray hair that I know of, anyway.  I'm all about dying my hair every month.  And really have been since I was 25.  I thought that I could kind of cheat those stupid grays, because I wouldn't see them.  Does that make sense?  And, I thought that I was more adjusted to the whole getting older thing, than I am.  I was a lot sadder than I had planned.  Also, Jeff has a bunch of gray hair.  And I don't know if it's society, or what, but I think on him, it's attractive.  On me?  Not so much.  
But, this was something that made me stop and think, as well.  I'm thankful to be alive at this point in time.  Where things are changing so quickly, I've been able to see a lot of things come into play in my lifetime.  Things that were just fleeting thoughts years ago.  Technology is rocking our world, and we are trying to become a more tolerant and united people.  Maybe it's not happening as quickly as we would like, but I think that for the most part, people are trying.  I'm so happy to be a part of a generation that is pushing individuality, and equality, and freedom to be...who you are.  After thinking about this, I'm okay with becoming an old lady.  I'm grateful for the things I've been able to see.

I really hope that everyone has an excellent Thanksgiving.  Regardless of where you are in your lives, or what your personal beliefs are, or wherever you are emotionally or spiritually, or physically, I honestly expect that there will be miracles occurring.  I hope that's the case with all of you and your families.  Much Love.  
Now that my computer is fixed, I'll try to be better about posting.  What's all of your excuse?  You know who you are.  
Peace out.