Holiday stuff.

Happy Holidays, to all! Jeff has actually had these past two weeks off, and consequently, I haven't had as much free time on my hands, so my blogging has been seriously lacking. (He's been adamant about us catching up on shows, watching movies, and playing new games that we received for Christmas). Sorry to all five of my readers. In addition to that, I've had family in town and I've been contacted by a half-sibling that I'd never met before. (FYI, it's going really well, and I'm thankful for this opportunity). So suffice it to say, it's been a busy week and a half. (Also, Jeff and Riley and Cole have been sick...take that with the constant demand of a newborn, and it makes for me being busy even during lazy days). Anyway, despite severe sleep deprivation, I am posting. I hope you all appreciate my efforts, will forgive any massive typos due to lack of functioning brain cells, and you haven't forgotten about me.
Let's see, Christmas Eve was busy for my little family. That's the day we do our visiting. I have told my family this for the last six years, however, they still seem surprised to know that this system is still in place. I THINK it's finally sinking in, though.
We visited my Dad and Teresa, first. They had gifts for the kids, and also offered us treats, so all in all a definite score. :) They both did well with picking out things they thought Riley and Cole would like. For the rest of the day, wherever we went both kids begged to let them bring their new toys. Sadly, because I'm a mean and cruel mother I always said no. One day they will appreciate how terrible I am, though. I'm sure. I'm hoping...
Next we stopped at Muff and Chris's house. She'd taken photos of Sydney and got them in early for me so I could pass them out to family. She totally hooks me up, and I'm always amazed at her talent, and the way her loving husband helps her. Also, they're sooo good to my kiddies. When she gives me the photos she's taken with the copyrights on them, I'll upload them onto my blog.
Our next stop was Bob and Maida's house. I'm bummed to say that I didn't take any pictures...and it's not that I don't WANT pictures, it's just that Jeff's family isn't like mine, in that we are always reminded to take photos. Someone always has a camera out, and then I remember to do it, too. Now, I'm also totally going to blame Kelli for my lack of Anderson photos, as well. She's the one that does take pictures, and she didn't remind me this time. Also, I feel justified in blaming her, because the whole time we were visiting the Anderson's she accused me of being a total raunch. And I must live up to that.
Lastly we went to my grandparents, where my Mom and Scott and my Aunt Sharon were staying. One thing that I WILL say about my babies having a lot of grandparents, is that they totally clean house on the holidays. Riley and Cole got to open gifts from my mom and grandparents and they enjoyed every second of it. They were totally taken care of. It was a nice day, and then we went home, opened our family presents to each other, and went to bed, anticipating Santa Claus's visit. (Oh, and I feel like I need to tell Amy that when we got home, I noticed that her and Kory's gift was under our tree instead of under Bob and Maida's tree, where all the other gifts that we took to others should have been. It turned out that Riley saw it and thought it was to us, instead of from us and put it under our tree...so Amy, if you're reading this and hopefully not hating me right now, Jeff will take your gift-nothing overly exciting, I'm sad to say-to Kory during racquetball this week. And sorry for totally sucking).
On a more personal note, I have another cold sore and a story that goes with it. You can't really see it in the above photo, however, I posted a picture of the offending grossness last time around, and I'm sure it was memorable enough that you all can still see it burned into your brains. Though I love the holidays, there is so much stress that comes with them, and for some reason, all the stress I feel manifests itself right on my face, for everyone to see. As we went to visit family on Christmas Eve, my cold sore was slowly getting out of the "just red" stage, and growing into the warty-pussy grossness phase. Ahh....fabulous. I'm sure everyone that I hadn't seen for a while enjoyed it just as much as I did.
Anyway, this leads me to my sad, sad story. Christmas Day, for our little family, was enjoyed immensely. We opened presents, got to nap, ate lots of chocolate, and stayed in our pajamas all day. Is that the definition of awesomeness? I think so. Our family got a Wii from Santa this year, and it took the majority of our day to make our little "Mii's" and just enjoy playing games and figuring stuff out. While Riley and Jeff were playing, I told Cole that he needed to sit with me at the table, and he needed to write in his Holiday journal. This is something his teacher sent home for him to do to work on his writing skills. He was to draw a picture and then write sentences describing what the picture portrayed. Anyway, all day he'd been playing with his new toys, trying out the Wii, and organizing his stuff--he and I hadn't had a lot of time to talk. He sat down and drew his picture then looked up at me while asking what he should write about his Chrismas Day, and stopped mid-sentence as he looked straight at me. "Mom", he said, "you got something kinda gross on your lip." I told him that I knew that, and he asked me what it was. I noticed that he couldn't make eye contact with my cold sore, and that he'd turned a greenish color. I told him I had a sore on my lip, and not to worry about it. He sat there for a few minutes and wouldn't look at me. I asked if he was okay, and he said that he just wanted to write his sentence and then go play--all the while not looking at me. I started to laugh, and he looked like he was going to start crying, so I told him he could go play, and we'd finish his sentences later. He then said, "Thanks Mom", without looking at me, and ran upstairs. The next day they were both playing the wii and Cole asked me to come down stairs to make him some eggs. So I went and started brunch when Riley asked me a question and I went into the living room to answer. Without looking at me Cole asked if I was done talking to Riley and asked me to please go back into the kitchen. Apparently I was still grotesque to look at but I still had to make him his eggs. For the next day and a half whenever he'd walk by me, he'd be very focused on the floor and just mumble "Hi mom, I love you". Yesterday morning I caught him looking at me, and he goes, "Your lip isn't puffy, mom." From then on, he didn't have to avoid looking at my face, and he loved me again.
I just thought I'd share. Like I said, limited functioning brain cells, so give me a break on this post.

As told to me by Jeff....

So Jeff told me another Cole story, which I will in turn, share with you. But let me give you some background, first. Feeding Sydney was a bit of a scary thing for me...I mean, we try to maintain some type of privacy here in our home, but that's usually because we can actually lock the door to the bathroom while it's in use. Anyway, back to feeding Sydney. Cole is a curious kid...and he has a gigantic gag reflex, and things weird him out. Nursing weirds ME out. I mean, I know it's natural, but that doesn't mean I'm going to feel comfortable nursing in front of people. I just don't. Yes, this is my third child, but I still feel just as strongly about this as I did with Riley. I don't have a problem with other's decisions, but as far as I'm concerned, this is where I stand on nursing my children: It's to be done in private. Riley knows where baby milk comes from, she remembers what I did when Cole was a baby. But Cole was pretty clueless. In fact, at first, I'd decided he just didn't need to know...and quickly realized that that wasn't the healthiest way to approach this subject, either.
Soon after we brought Sydney home, Cole asked me the dreaded question..."Mom, what DOES Sydney eat? Where is the milk? Where does it come from?" I answered as honestly as I could. I said, "Well, you know why women have breasts?" He goes, "what's breasts?" I said, "Well, breasts are boobs. That's another name for them." Riley was there, and she added, "yeah, ladies have boobs and they fill with milk for the babies, and that's what the babies eat." He seemed to handle that just fine. I thought he'd completely be disgusted and refuse to let all of us talk about it. But apparently that made perfect sense to him. Anyway, when I do feed Sydney now, and I'm covered up, he'll say things like, "I knew she was hungry", and just be on his way. He has no weirdness about it at all, and this makes life a lot easier.
But apparently, he DOES think about it, occasionally. Last night while I was cleaning the kitchen, Cole went into his and Riley's room, while Jeff was in there, too. Apparently he was wearing one of my bras. I don't know where he got it, it must have been in the dirty laundry or something. Anyway, he goes into the room, ignores Jeff, and says, "Look at me, Riley. I look like Mom, so Sydney was trying to bite me."
My son cracks me up.

It's true love.

Helloooo! I've been hearing from people that I have sucked at getting posts up, lately. Excuse me, but giving birth, and then actually taking care of the infant, is hard work. Plus, when I do have extra time, I find that I am holding Sydney...just cause she'll only smell like this for so long, she'll only have her baby orangutan hair for so long, she'll only be nine pounds for so long...you get the picture. Because I know for certain that this baby is the last, I find that everything she does is that much more enchanting. (It makes for boring blog posts, I know...but either you totally know where I'm coming from, or you will, eventually). I had forgotten how hard this is. I forget how hard, EVERY time, but it's well worth it. I've been carefully monitoring Riley and Cole around Sydney...and honestly, I don't think that they could love anyone more. Even when she stinks...and cries, and burps and farts...Riley and Cole are there to kiss her, and somehow translate each sigh and grunt into what she needs at that exact second. Then, of course, they relay the message to me, and it's MY job to alleviate her any annoyance in the timeliest manner, possible.
Sydney is making huge progress. She's a strong little girl. I'm posting one of those really boring "parent videos", in which my child does something that just isn't very interesting or original, however, because I think it's the cutest thing ever, I'm pretending that you'll think so, as well. So you can watch it, or not. You'd think that I would be over that sort of thing...but actually I'm just annoyed that the digital revolution wasn't around the first couple of times I had kids. It's just so sad that I won't have as many memories of Riley and Cole, simply because we couldn't afford the toys that we have now, then.

We've all had a hard/fun time adjusting to our new schedules. Riley and Cole got to stay home that first week that we brought Sydney home, and now they are back to school. (Luckily for them, it's only this week, and then they have two weeks off for Christmas break). Unfortunately for me, the kids have gone back to school and so in addition to not having their help, which was greatly appreciated by me, they will also be bringing every type of cold and flu virus...just in time for us to stew in all of it over the holiday break. Yay...
Riley has surprised me most with Syd. She said she was excited for her to get here, and she was excited to see what Syd would look like, but other than that, she wasn't overly interested in the whole pregnancy process. I guess being that I was a bigger, meaner, more tired version of me, it makes a bit of sense. Anyway, these days she wakes up early on her own to "help" with Sydney. Or when I'm changing Syd or she's mad cause I'm trying to get her fed but going about it too slowly, she's offering to help with distracting her sister for as long as I need, I am really lucky that our new little one is loved so much.
Cole is pretty chill about the whole arrival of Syd. He loves her, and he gives her hugs and kisses, but my son has a very weak stomach...the kind where he will just heave chunks if you even start talking about something gross. (Note: never mention zombies in his presence). Seriously though, he will start vomiting for no reason, only that you have officially triggered his gag reflex. If it didn't piss me off so much, I'd probably be amazed at his talent. Since Sydney is a newborn...and they are all equipped with the terrifying "Umbilical stump", Cole had to disappear each time I would change Sydney's diaper or clothing. Also, when she was bundled up nice and neat, he'd be compelled to talk to her and encourage her to play. If I were to expose her stomach in any way, he'd be out of there. And then he'd call to me from about two rooms away about when I'd be done, and when he could come back in. I didn't realize this was what was bugging him until Riley told me about it. I then confronted him, and asked if that were the reason he jets every time....I was answered when he started to dry heave and told me, "I just don't want to talk about it".
I do have an exciting announcement, however. Last night Sydney's umbilical stump came off. I think that's such a scary name for it...however, fitting. So now I don't have that extra stress, and this makes me happy. Also, scary belly button aside, we've noticed that Noony has been strategically placed wherever Sydney is. This is positive proof that Cole is smitten with his baby sister. I mean, I had pretty high hopes, but this goes way above and beyond him tolerating her and all the time she takes. That's pretty much it for now. I don't have a lot of news, as we are kind of home-bound lately. But it's been nice. So, I promise my posts will get better, eventually. Right now we're all a bit star-struck, and all my free time goes into holding Syd...just watching her.
Oh, and for those of you that are wondering, yes, Jeff does spend time with Syd, as well. I just need to get better about taking pictures. Right now she and Jeff take their evening bath together...and for the sake of my readers, I haven't got any of those precious moments on my digital devices. But as soon as I get a good one, you'll be the first to know.

Not really sure what happened...

Hello everyone. The end part of last week was a busy and eventful one for this family...so it's kind of still surreal to be here. On Wednesday, December 3rd, I turned 31. However, in my mind, I'm still like, 27...so that's how old I'll refer to myself as, from now on. It's just more logical to me, this way. Besides, I can only handle so much reality, so you'll all be the ones forced to deal. Anyway, on December 3rd, I got a text from my sister-in-law saying that she'd been in labor a while, and they were going to break her water. I was happy for her, as I knew what she'd been going through, believe me, I knew. But at the same time I was overly jealous, as well. She was due a week later than I...and here she was going into labor, about to be done. Sometimes I am a terrible, terrible person.
Anyway, my birthday was good. I was still pregnant, true, but for Sydney's sake, I didn't want her to have to share birthdays with me. Jeff and I took the kids to school, and then went to the mall, just to hopefully put me into labor, and buy me some stuff from Bath and Body Works.
Have I mentioned how great buying stuff for me is? Well, it is. However, I'm sure you're more interested in the next part of the story. I made Jeff and the kids take me to the Training Table for dinner...where I can order and eat an entire plateful of french fries covered in cheddar cheese. It. Was. Awesome. After our dinner, I wasn't feeling that great. Massive stomachache, and issues from overeating fries and cheese...and the worst cramps ever. So, I took castor oil again...just to maybe get things started, or other things stopped. Anyway, all grossness aside, I started to have contractions. And after a while, Jeff went to sleep, and I kept feeling them. I decided that I would take myself to the hospital after two hours of feeling them, about two minutes apart, each. (They were tiny, and I knew there was no way my body was moving anything with those, but Sydney'd kind of stopped moving for a long time, and I thought I'd just go get everything checked out, and make sure there was no stress on her behalf. I woke Jeff up about 2ish, and told him that I was driving myself to the hospital, and he asked if I wanted him to take me. I told him no, because I didn't want to be embarrassed, when they sent me home, and I didn't want Kelli to come over to be with the kids for a few hours, and then have to tell everyone about my false alarm. He mumbled "okay", and laid back down.
I got to the hospital, and checked myself in. They took me to a room equipped with a bed and all the hookups. I got into one of those ridiculous gowns and just waited for the nurse to tell me that things weren't progressing, and that I was going to have to wait until the next day, when I'd have been a week overdue, and my doctor would induce me. So an hour went by and they watched my and Sydney's progression, which wasn't that intense, however, my contractions got harder...and fewer. So the nurse went to call my Doctor, came back, and told me that my doctor, the same man that made me go home two hours early of an exact week when I had Cole, said I could be admitted. I called Jeff, he showed up at about 5:30, they gave me pitocin, things progressed, and they broke my water. (The HARDEST and quickest labor I've ever had ensued, and) at 10:46 am, on December 4th of this year, Sydney Joy was born. She was encased in the waxy stuff the nurse referred to as "cheese", weighed 9lbs. 1 oz., and was 21 in. long. Cheese aside, she was beautiful. I was so happy to see her...and as you can see, I had no reservations about having my picture taken with my now larger family...however, seeing my hair right now, tells me I should have taken the proper precautions, first.
Anyway, she was healthy, and strong, and I'm so grateful, still. Seeing her little face, hearing her sighs, and feeling her weight makes me so happy. Even worth the saggy tummy and excess fat that will take forever to lose. I hate being pregnant...but I love my babies. I was so scared to have another one, because it's hard to imagine loving something the way I love Jeff, Riley, and Cole. But as soon as I saw her little face, she just made her way into the same category as them.
My sister-in-law ended up having her baby on my birthday. Story Grace, 8lbs. 7oz.I'm excited, and I've vowed to be a better "Aunt Twin" than the one I had while growing up. My Aunt "Bambi" had the same b-day as me, too...but she was completely whacked. She had three inch long nails, wore blue eyeshadow, huge hair, and had a huge gap between her front teeth that she'd stick her tongue in when she'd laugh at one of her own dirty jokes. (Also, she would sporadically remind me that we were a type of kindred spirits, and our birthday was a reason why we were so much alike). So, I have had the example to learn about what NOT to be like. I promise that I will be less trashy than Bambi, no matter what. Also, Sydney and Story will be the best of friends, I'm totally sure of it. Look at them, they're pretty tight already, so it's all planned out. My sister-in-law ended up having a c-section, so even though I went into labor later, I got to leave the hospital sooner. But besides some uncomfort for obvious reasons, she and Story are doing well, and as you can see, her daughter is beautiful. A big thanks to all visitors, callers, etc. Everything is going great, and we are all happy. Right now, I'm a bit out of it...lack of sleep and all, so please know that we appreciate all of you and all the attention. We're truly blessed. Love to all.

Dr. Appt.

As of right now, there is no "new" news. After an ENTIRE night of contractions, and finally being released from them at 5:00 am this morning, NOTHING happened except for a bit of softening of my cervix. So, the castor oil was for nothing, really. I drank it, and proceeded to puke everything back up, and now I'm thinking I'm not even gonna be cleaned out. Oh well. I guess it's just more poop for my doctor to put with. Hey, I tried to be thoughtful.
I had to get some anti-nausea medication, because I've been throwing everything up, and for some reason, I have a huge bruise all around my belly button, but other than that, I guess I'm okay. As long as Sydney is fine, I'm pretty good with everything. There was more protein in my urine, but my blood pressure looked fine, so no inducing yet. It may be another week or so before I get to hold my little squish. Jeff and I kind of have bets going on how big she'll be, and we both agree that she'll way over ten pounds. Luckily I didn't gain anymore weight...I attribute this to my recent bulimia...excellent.
Anyhoo, that's all for now. This was just my appt. update for those of you that keep checking in. I'll let you know more when I find out more. I'm going to be lying low for a while, as I know that my days of laziness are numbered and I'm trying to cash in on every extra wink I can get. So, until next time ladies and gents.

Last minute thoughts

My posts are always about my new dilemma and "how will I make it?" But when it comes down to the end game, I seem to get through just by the skin of my teeth. Someone, a lot of someones, always look out for me, and I am really grateful. I still complain about EVERYTHING, as you all know, but I do want to state that for the record, I DO feel the love. Tonight I took castor oil. I have taken it while pregnant with Riley and Cole, and it didn't do anything, but clean me out....and that is actually its own reward. My third child, and I know how it goes down in the delivery room--how after that first really hard contraction, you really could care less who is staring at your lady business, you're just trying to get that baby out. And so, I know that there's a big chance that I could be pooping all over those people that are standing/watching/staring from that vantage point. That being said, I still do what I can to try to avoid it, you know? Not that I really know whether or not I have, and in my own mind, I like to think that in no way is it a possibility. But that's all I have, so I'm trying to take the proper precautions.
It's weird to think that this time next week, no matter what, Sydney will be home with us. Tomorrow at 2:00 is my next appt. and from there we will be able to kind of see where things will go as far as getting her out. I've been feeling like maybe my blood pressure is spiking again. Just a lot of headaches, nausea, and peppery vision--those black dots and such, you know? So maybe my Doctor will say we're just going to go ahead and take her. Wishful thinking, anyway. I'll let everyone know, in any case. Anyway, just keeping you up to date. Sydney's been a good listener so far, and stayed where she's needed to be. Now that it's all clear, lets see if we can get her out.

Thankful Tag on Thanksgiving

I've been tagged by Shauna, and I kind of put it off--just cause I've actually been busy since I've been off bed rest. Not TOO busy, mind you, but busy enough that I haven't been online all day long. Anyway, I'm here now, being a big girl, figuratively with making my own turkey, and literally with Sydney residing in my midsection. I'm going to stop rambling and let you know what I'm thankful for, using the letters of my name.

R: Riley, Cole, Jeff, and Sydney. I wouldn't be here if it weren't for them, seriously. I say it a lot, but it's hard for me to truly comprehend and express how much my little family means to me. Sometimes I catch fleeting glimpses, as I see Riley sketching or when I fix her hair, or watch her walk into school, and I see how beautiful she is. How it amazes me that at one time, she was where Sydney is, now. I watch Cole as he talks to me, learning how to read, and takes a great interest in letters and sounds and how they all work together. My heart swells and I can't imagine life without my baby boy. And Sydney keeps me up at night, and while I wish she'd just settle down and go to sleep, I'm satisfied to feel her moving; to know first hand that she's strong, and I get overly excited to meet her. Lastly, there's Jeff, and he's my absolute best friend. There's isn't anything I can't tell him, and above all, he makes me feel loved, and protected and cherished, and he does the same for the kids.

A: Abilities. I'm able to get up and walk, talk, bend, comprehend, read, love, listen, argue, and the list goes on and on. I'm so grateful for these things that I take for granted everyday. It would be cool to have a super power, or something that sets me apart from everyone else...but on the other hand, I see others that may not have every ability that I do right now, and I wonder at their strength and perseverance. I believe we all have our own challenges, and that some of us are stronger than others, as far as that's concerned. But I'm grateful for the abilities that I do have, that I can care for my babies and my husband.

I: Insecurities. I know this is an odd thing to be thankful for. But my insecurities keep me more open, I believe. Thankfully, they aren't as prominent as they were in my teenage years, and yes, they're still annoying and cliche a lot of the time, but in other ways, they help me. I want to be a great mom...not just for everyone else to say I am, but for my kids to look back and know that I really tried. I want to be a good wife. I want to keep a clean house and a loving home. I want to be attractive and fun to be around. I never want to be offensive, or hurtful. These are things I worry about daily. But they also keep me in line, in a way. My insecurities keep me from being too sure of myself, and too set in my own ways. I know that's a skewed way to look at it, but it's how I feel.

N: Nearness of friends and family through technology. I'm thankful that I can call, or text, or email, or visit most of who I need or want to. I believe that technology is a fabulous thing...I love my toys: Ipod, laptop, Cell phone, Camera, Media Players, etc. All these things help me stay "nearer" to my loved ones. Also, I'm more of a writer than a talker. (It's true--for those of you rolling your eyes). Texting and email are two things I don't think I could do without--or blogging. I appreciate being able to reach out to friends and family through my toys. If I had to depend solely on traveling, I'd never get to stay in touch with anyone.

E: Eating. This time of year, especially. But honestly, food is a celebration for me. I also have those "emotional eating" problems, but you gotta take the good with the bad. I love that my belly is always full, and so are the bellies of my children. How it would be to not be able to provide that for me and mine, is something I've never had to face, and I'm truly grateful for that. Also, my favorite get-togethers always involve food, and the companionship and happiness that go with it.

Y: Yes--the word. I'm thankful when I hear it, this means things are going well and working out. This means questions I've asked have been answered and things are set in motion. This means my thoughts are agreed with, or validated. This means someone has confided in me, and thinks of me as a worthwhile friend. This means my kids and my husband are okay and happy. Though all this isn't the true meaning of the word yes, this is how it affects me.

Anyway, I am thankful for all these things and so much more, I'm just limited by some letters. I'm thankful for today, and the meal I'll be sharing with Muff and Chris and my family, and for the happiness they all bring to my life. I hope all you have a very happy Thanksgiving, and know that my thoughts and well wishes are with you. May your bellies be full, and your conversation be captivating. Happy Thanksgiving!