Second New Home Update:

More of the same.  Which is, still sitting here, in squalor, going insane...not having any room to move anything or clean anything.  Except...I cleaned up some puke this morning--that's new.  I would take some pictures, (not of the puke), but I'm so tired of seeing my house like this each day that I can't look at it any more than absolutely necessary.    I'm kinda afraid that the longer the Lenders of our buyers hold out, the less chance the new owners will have of moving into a somewhat nice place.  All our disappointments seem to be manifesting themselves into more messes and spills and laziness and apathy.  I'm thinking this is one of the reasons that "crack houses" look the way they do.  Just my opinion, of course...but I'm pretty used to being right. 
In other news, we went GROCERY shopping.  This was a good thing.  We recently found out that we will have to be leaving our fridge behind--an oversight that screwed us all over.  So we decided to just use all our freezer stuff and fridge stuff, instead of spending money for more stuff.  That would have been a great idea...if the contents of our freezer weren't completely freezer burned and had expirations of, most recently, two years ago.  I guess some family traits die hard, right?  :)
Anyway, after we found out that we won't be able to close until at least this coming Wednesday-excuse me, THEY won't be able to close, because we already have-we just kinda withered into defeatism, and have been here for the last four days.  It's a somewhat glum place.  And it smells a little like gasoline, and none of us know why, only that we hope this house doesn't blow up within the stated amount of time.  So maybe we're living in a "Meth house", instead.  Take your pick.  
So yeah...We may be able to start moving in on Thursday.  I won't say, "by the latest", because this is a phrase I've heard A LOT over the past two months, and I've decided that in this industry, there's no such thing.  So I'm going to say: "I hope we get to move in by Thursday, because that was the last date that was mentioned to me...and at the time I was thinking: THURSDAY?!  WTF?! But now I'm thinking:  Fingers crossed everybody!"
I'm assuming there's some grand lesson we're supposed to be learning here.  As of yet, I'll admit it:  I'm clueless and pissed.  But, I did notice in today's ads that Best Buy is having a deal on washers, dryers, fridges, and freezers.  So maybe that's it.  I'm really reaching here, but there's not a lot else I can do about it.  
I went to our new house last night...just to check the mail, and, according to the bright red note taped on the door for all to see, the power has been turned off there.  Awesome. 
This is the only reason I can think of to shake my fist at the reality of this being a Holiday weekend.  Any other time I'm be happy to be lazy and just enjoy my pajamas.  But I'm tired of that, now.  I want to be able to complain about nicks and dents in walls from the move, and hang clothes in my new ginormous closet--and here's an idea:  WEAR SOME DIFFERENT CLOTHES.  I may just retire the three pairs of sweats I've been living in for the last two weeks.  At this point I would say, "I Will", but we all know that my love of sweatpants is greater than that.  I will retire two pairs, for sure...as they have paint splats in ugly places.  I'm not that far gone...not yet anyway.  I'll have to see on Thursday.  
Hope everyone is having a great Memorial Day weekend.  Even if I'm so totally not.  
No one can say I'm not a giver.

Housing Update:

BIG FAT NOTHING!  
We closed on our house...on Tuesday. (Without money, but the buyers were supposed to close today, and everything was supposed to fund by at latest, Friday).  Our buyers DID NOT close today.  The lenders need "more employment information".  So everything done in good faith is now up in the air, waiting for some more good faith.  Whatever.
Until they close, the money doesn't appear.  
Until the money appears, we can't start moving crap.
Until we start moving crap, we really can't clean, because everything is crowded and horrible. 
Until everything stops being crowded and horrible, I'll continue to be grouchy and prone to migraines. 


Poop, poop, poopy-poop, crap.  I'm angry and frustrated and cynical.  Until next time.

Too many questions.

Me again.  Answerless. Yet again.  When will I know what's going on with the moving process?  No clue.  When will I know when I'll need help moving?  No clue.  When will we be able to put our tons of crap into our newer larger home to accommodate said amounts of crap?  NO FREAKING CLUE.  And let me just say this anger is NOT aimed at those of you that have offered your services and time, not at all.  I honestly appreciate it.  I just hate the fact that I have nothing to tell you.  And if I do tell you something, I'm changing it at least twenty times before anything actually happens.  And then there's the situation of the guy that's renting from the owner of the home we're buying.  Today we are going to do a scary drive-by to scope it out, and see if there's any evidence that he's getting his stuff and moving it.  And I feel kind of bad, because he's been on the same roller coaster we all have--one day needing to get out, and the next day hearing that something didn't go through, so he's good for a while longer.  (Btw, it looks like things are moving along at the house that we'll move into.  Hopefully he also remembers to clean his toilets).  Anyway, that's my update for you all.  Things could happen this week, but we don't know. 

In other news, I am now convinced that I would be a serial killer if I had to confine myself into a small space with people I love and not be able to put things where I want them.  Funny how something so little will put me over the edge.  How having a mountain of boxes in my way, and the dishes and silverware all willy-nilly will make me stay awake at night and plot some kind of revenge on everyone and everything.  Also a bit on the scary side.  

In other news, the process of packing and having things unorganized and what-not isn't hard only for me.  Syd has recently begun to look like an abused baby.  More abused than normal, anyway.  She's gotten a black eye, and a lot of bruises and cuts within the last week. 

And we've had less time to just sit with her and tickle her arms and legs, so she's been pretty clingy.  I'm thinking that once you get used to "Princess Status", it's not an easy role to just give up.  I feel bad that Riley and Cole were little at a time when Jeff and I were always going--and life was just too busy to have a lot of time to just sit and rub little arms and legs.  But we tried to schedule it in whenever possible.  Sydney, however, seems to think it's her daily right, because she's so beautiful that there isn't anything Jeff or myself should or would rather be doing. 

Honestly?  She kind of has something there.  Youngest kids are the luckiest ones, for sure.  I can honestly say that now.  Because parents know that they won't have this time again, and so they try to cram in every second they can, because that time goes so fast. Okay, that's all for now.  Hopefully I'll have some more news--GOOD news--later this week.  Later y'all.

Two out of three ain't bad.

First off, this is not a homage to Meatloaf's song with the same name.  But it is in reference to it.  Because I find that song extra insulting.  Have you ever listened to the words?  Probably not...because Meatloaf, (aside from his role in Fight Club), is in my opinion, pretty lame.  However, the song, "Two Out of Three Ain't Bad", fits my life experiences at this time.   Fits this household's life experiences at this time.  Let me just say that at first this post was labeled:  "Bleh".  And I had to change it.
Okay.  So, you know when you get to the end of a really good dream, and by really good dream I mean the kind where everything you want pretty much falls into your lap...not the gross kind.  Anyway, everything you want just keeps getting put into place, and it feels like that's the path your life is now on...missing paperwork?  Found it!  Continual headaches and exhaustion?  Not anymore!  Constant phone calls to and from Realtors, Lenders, and Financial inquirers, etc.? No more answering of my phone is required! Those have been my dreams of late. Pretty much continual awesomeness.  And then?  And then I woke up.  And I'm freaking sicker than I have been in forever.  I mean, I can't talk, I can't breathe, I can't sleep, I can't be in the same room as normal people and NOT sound like I'm going to hack up both my lungs in loud, obnoxious bursts.  But that was okay, because I had stuff to do.  I had things to pack; things to clean.  

And Jeff has been preoccupied with putting sprinklers in our backyard--a job that was supposed to last two days, and has turned out to be an ongoing two week job, due to the way Americraft hastily put our sprinklers together willy-nilly.  After the digging, the fitting, the gluing, the BAZILLION runs to Home Depot, he thought he was done.  And FOUR more times of that same routine, he was.   As you can see, Jeff's been busy too. 
So last Monday, I was mopping my floor...and not hating it and being positive because it's my new tile.  And I was thinking that it was just so much easier to clean than old, cheap linoleum.  
Until I saw a water spot.  Where I hadn't yet mopped.  Immediately I was ticked with Syd and her not-cute habit of throwing her sippy cups to the floor when she gets tired of carrying them around.  And then there are big puddles of Apple Juice in various places.  Occasionally, she gets by me...usually when JEFF is supposed to be watching her.  Anyhoo, this wet spot was different...it looked like instead of a spill, that it was more like a drip.  From way up.  So, that's where I looked.  And there was a teeny drop that chose to fall at that moment.  From the ceiling, just out of a spot that I never would have noticed had I not been standing right under it.  Just over a week away from our closing date...the inspection and the appraisal had just passed, and things were starting to actually happen.  This is when panic started to set in.  
From there Jeff and I were convinced that the kid's toilet was leaking.  And it was.  There was water all around the base of it.  Jeff fixed it, and sealed it better.  And now it doesn't leak.  For the sake of time and effort...I'm now just going to outline what came next:
-Happiness for one day
-Then back to panic on Wednesday night
  (Jeff had just laid down, and I was in the kitchen getting some medication that would hopefully knock me out, and help me avoid coughing in Jeff's face all night.  In grateful relief I started the dishwasher and looked up where we "used to have a leak".  And I saw a YELLOW water stain, in a different area than the first time).
-I wake Jeff to tell him to go look at it.  We are both tired, and get less than 2 hours of sleep that night.
-Jeff comes home from working all day then racquetball at night, and checks ALL possible water sources:  the kid's bathtub, toilet, sink, washing  machine. 
-Meanwhile, I do laundry in our crappy washer and dryer. (Laundry relaxes me).
-Seeing no alternative, Jeff opens up a hole in our ceiling...exactly six days before our supposed   closing date on selling this house.

-After the hole is opened up, Jeff sees that not only is there a hidden light socket behind the drywall, but the exact spot he's opened up has been opened before.  (We are the only people that have lived in this house...Ah, Americraft, you are truly a classy home builder).
And finally, after all that?  We find that our crappy dryer is the cause of all the damage.  I had told Jeff that something was wrong with it...that we kept getting water in the dryer, and the clothes would take like FOUR cycles to get dry.  That's not an exaggeration.  One day I hung two pairs of pants out to dry, and they were done before the clothes that were put in the dryer were. Anyway, in the hole, Jeff saw that water was dripping out of a sheet metal pipe...where a screw had been placed.  Apparently, eight years of lint build up in a non-code dryer pipe will foil all your plans. And trap so much water where there should be only air flow, that it will put a literal pool in your ceiling.  Good stuff to know. 

And here's what Jeff drug out of the vent...

Water and smelly lint that had been in there for who knows how long.  Who knew the result of cleaning stuff would be so nasty?

So now, even though we only have 6 days before we are supposed to close on our new home...we need to pack, we need to sleep, we need to get better so we can have a little freaking energy.  And, we need to patch, mud, tape and sand that hole in the kitchen.  And texturize it so it doesn't look like we just fixed a leak and lose our sale. And then we need to use as little laundry as possible because both our washer and dryer are completely jacked.  So, no relaxing for me.  

Needless to say,   After my "Grateful" post I didn't feel overly excited to blog about my last week. Luckily the sprinklers now work, thanks to Jeff and the leak is now not leaking, thanks to Jeff.  So, two out of three ain't bad, right?  Yeah, but it's still pretty sucky.   Fingers crossed, we'll get mad amounts of stuff done this next week.  And if that happens, I will be grateful, even if I still feel like absolute crap.

Grateful

Sometimes it's hard for me to remember the things I need to...to remember that I'm grateful for so many things in my life.  On one hand I get frustrated and ask "why me?" and then on the other hand, I will occasionally get a reality smack, and realize I have so much.  I have a family that loves me, friends that care about me, and all the necessities a person needs and a lot of things that aren't all that necessary, but I want.  I have limbs that work, a brain that is usually functioning, the ability and reasons to laugh, and so many more things that I can't even remember, much less document at this time.  What it comes down to, really, is that when I weed out my whining and boo-hooing, I'm at a place I'm very happy with.  

See?  How can I be a sad-sack when I've got such goodness all around me?  (Except for Syd...I told her she couldn't pour water all over the carpet, and her cries of objection ensued).  
I've said before that I'm on Facebook a lot.  Simply because I'm a voyeur and I enjoy reading people's thoughts and feelings during the day.  It makes me feel a lot more normal.  (And sometimes provides daily humor, affirmation, information, etc). I've found that the random thoughts and feelings that occur in me aren't all that individualized.  That there are a lot of people that are just as insecure, or ticked, or happy, or scared, or whatever, just the way I am, at any given time.  Not that this should be overly surprising, but I think we all feel incredibly alone sometimes, or that no one could possibly understand our deeply personal and peculiar emotions.  
I have been following one of my "friends" on Facebook and this person, I've decided, is deeply disturbed.  Not that their thoughts and feelings don't make for a good story, but at times I feel myself thinking:  "Come on.  We all have crap days, we've all dated complete losers, we've all had people we trusted completely screw us over..." and so on, and so forth.  But this person seems to be taking their life very personally.  To an almost alarming degree.  To the extent of a depressed adolescent--and as we all know that means A LOT of drama.  I take turns feeling deep sympathy for them, and rolling my eyes in frustration.  In the end, though, they've encouraged me to open my eyes and see how easy I have it.  I felt bad for a while for taking their pain and turning it into a life lesson, but now I'm okay with it.    
Anyway, after a VERY long introduction to my smallish point, I'm grateful and I need to express that more often.  This whole house thing had gotten me down, I'll admit it.  Not that it should have, but I've kind of been in this weird funk in which I'd been trying to get excited and motivated about my house, about summer, about possible vacation plans, about just doing normal everyday stuff, and I really couldn't, because it just felt futile.  Nothing was for sure--I didn't know what projects to start, because I wasn't sure if I could finish them, or if I did finish them, if they'd be appreciated, because our home may not be ours for very much longer.   
Today I went with Jeff and Bob and Maida, (my in-laws, for anyone not in the know), and the kids, and we looked through our soon-to-be-new-home, again.  Or I guess I should say, new to us.  It was built in 1978, and it's been fully remodeled.  Jeff and I had actually looked into building a new home.  But I kind of felt that that decision, for us, would be kind of wasteful.  Not that I'm saying building new homes is wasteful, it's just that we felt we wanted to find a place without neighbors so close, and maybe an established neighborhood--as we've been in a newer one, and see all the weirdness that occurs.  Lots of squished homes and tons of solicitors, and people that believe they have much more space than they really do...i.e. horse trailers and over five vehicles, and three families to a single dwelling.  I know this happens in older neighborhoods, too...but I'm hoping it's not as commonplace?  I don't know. More space was our main concern...and these days, if you buy a lot to build on, chances are your neighbors will be VERY close. 
Moving on.  It was nice to see our possible new home again.  This time it was a more relaxed walk- through.  We DID notice that the guy living there right now is incapable of flushing the toilet after he uses it, and Cole was pretty grossed out about it...(when he does it, it's not as gross, apparently). 
This time around it felt like this house is even more for us.  It wasn't as "perfect" as I remembered it.  There were more bumps and chips and things that made it look more like a home that we can make our own, despite the fact that there have been all those upgrades and such.  So even though it contains things that I've been wanting forever, we can still make changes that will make it ours.  I'm really excited to get started.  

This is the "old farm" copper kitchen sink.  And I'm not sure if you can tell or not, but the counter tops aren't the formica stuff--they're wooden.  And gorgeous.  Something I'm sure will bring out even more of my obsessive compulsive side, as I'll be overly concerned about anyone cutting stuff on them and so on and so forth, but I'm excited.  Way excited.  My picture isn't as fantabulous as the real thing, but when we move in, you're all invited to see for yourselves.  ;) Anyway, that's all for now.  Hopefully this will be the week that we will know some specifics.  Good thoughts only, and loads of being grateful.  Life is good. 

By the way...

I think things are progressing.  I don't know--my realtor is still out of town, and things aren't exactly clear.  Our loan processor has questions we can't answer and I'm too afraid to ask our realtor when she's going to be back, as the nature of her trip is personal and kinda sad...so, here I am:  Wanting to get the appropriate information for the appropriate enquirers, but not wanting to step on any toes, or seem like an uncaring wench.  So I remain in a state of confusion and angst.  Ugh.  

In the meantime, I do have something that keeps me really quite busy.  I don't have as much time to be frustrated and think about unpleasant possibilities.  And before you assume, this isn't a form of my abusive nature, she chose to do these things, herself.  Syd seems to think that if it's small, and if it's open, it's hers.  And even if she gets stuck, scraped, or bumped, it's my fault.  And how DARE I have allowed it to happen. 

(That's her "screaming in indignation" face, btw).  Jeff and I have been showing our home like, twice a week.  I'm really hoping that after April is over things will slow WAY down, because I'm done being so much meaner than usual.  I can't help it...I clean and clean and clean...only to have someone possibly show, and depending on how clean it is seems to have a direct link to how long they stay.  A negative link, because it seems like after I take the time to vacuum and dust, and make sure that all Syd's toys aren't just off the floor, but out of sight, the people looking at our house stay for little more than four seconds.  It's the visits when I've had two seconds notice and there is still paper on the floor from Riley and Cole's newfound origami obsession, and a smell of recent poopy diaper in the air, that's when they decide to hang out for a half hour.  I still haven't figured the system out. 

Anyway, that's all for now.  I think we are on the up and up...but as I said before, I don't know for sure...and there isn't a "for sure" way to find out right now.  Meanwhile, I've been missing bookclub and any weekend activities that may or may not be fun, but don't allow me to be here at anyone's beck and call to judge my home.  As exciting as that sounds, I'm burned out.  Big time.  
In unrelated news, the kids are almost out of school, and I'm VERY stoked about this.  Also, fyi, it's time for Jeff's work's annual Lagoon Day. (It's on Memorial Day, btw).  And remember what I said last year about getting someone to come along for ten bucks and they can have a fun-filled day at Lagoon, and occasionally let Jeff and I actually ride together?  (Yes, watching my three children occasionally is a requirement).  If you're interested, let me know.  If not, no worries.  Just thought I'd bring it up.  

Have a fantabulous week.

Making myself manic.

So it's now getting into May.  Well, we have exactly one week and one day until it's officially May...from the time this is being typed.  First off, I need to answer a question:  Yes, I DID in fact take the kids out of school for Riley's birthday.  I would have done that Cole's birthday, as well, but his was during the spring break.  I remember having to go to school on my birthday like, every year.  And it blew.  So I ask them whether or not they want to go, and surprise, the answer is "no". I get extra "good mom" points for that...only to be taken away when some fiasco like locking my toddler in the car comes along.  It's all a system of checks and balances.
Anyway, I was going to keep it on the down-low, but we are back on for the dream home.  It's almost been a week and I can't think about anything else.  I'm not sleeping and I'm craving sugar, and I'm living in this in-between state of "should I start on this?" and "am I just setting myself up for more disappointment?" Basically, stuck in limbo...keeping my house clean, and trying to keep my mind on other things...but massively failing. So there it is.  And, the saddest part, is that Riley and Jeff both are sharing in my manic activities.  The idea of our possible new home is taking up their thought processes, as well.  And so we seem to be brain dead.  Er, more so than usual.  
My realtor is gone for the week, and I have had questions every second of every day.  
Anyway, that's that.  That's what's happening here.  I've started jogging again--that's kinda new.  I feel better about myself, and it helps with the nonstop mind-tease of the house and all the possibilities.
May...that's when it supposedly all goes down.  I'll let you know more when I do.  But after thinking about it, I realized that I might as well say what I'm thinking now...so if it doesn't work, you'll know why I'm bitter about everything.  And if it does work, you can hear how properly grateful I am for all the good vibes that I know have been sent this way.  And a big "THANKS!" to you all, btw.  Because I think this second chance has a lot to do with some help from my friends. 
Okay, that's all for now.  I'm kinda tired...and kinda anxious.  That's usual for me these days.  Later Gators.