It's in the urine.

Okay. So I went to the doctor's office today. This post may get a little unsavory. So for my readers that are grossed out by my usual frankness, you may want to skip this one.
I've been feeling crappier than usual. This isn't too surprising to me, seeing as how I always feel crappy during pregnancy. I'm also a hypochondriac, so anything that seems out of the ordinary, to me, is dire straits. I mean, I can handle pain. I don't have a problem with needles or being poked and prodded, or tests or cuts, or really any of that stuff. (Also, I know I complain about the pain of exams, but that is all really in my head, and I know this...it's emotionally painful to me to know that someone that I really don't know is digging around in an area that I'm pretty protective of...and looking for signs of life. It's more of a "please don't look at me" feeling, rather than actual pain). I am, however, very concerned about the unknown...and symptoms that may match negative outcomes. It's a conundrum, I know, but I've told you before--not a lot about me is rational.
Anyway, lately I've been having what I thought were possible little contractions. Not that I would know, because I've never had one that hasn't been given to me, by Pitocin. Contractions, and labor, though they hurt, I know that this is what's expected to get the baby out, and so I deal. However, it's completely different to me when I'm in my bed, at night, worrying about the possibility of needing to go to the hospital, exactly two weeks before our insurance kicks in. This makes for some nasty nightmares.
So, while I've been having some unusual pain, I have been quite stoic, and just dealt with it; rationalizing that perhaps this is normal stuff, and I wouldn't know just cause it's never happened before. Also, these little so-called contractions, if that's what they were, would help to soften and open my cervix. Maybe making labor more of a natural issue for me, rather than one that has to be planned down to the last second, as with Riley and Cole.
Anyway, today I find out that despite my trying to be a "big girl" about the uncertainty, and the dizziness, and the overall fatigue that I get from EVERYTHING, I'm actually in the early stage of Preeclampsia. According to my urine test, I have a plus one in protein...and should it get any higher, the doctor told me he'll have to "take the baby" next week. By C-section? By just inducing? I don't know and he didn't say. He DID say to come into his office IMMEDIATELY should I feel rotten (and hello, I always do), have a persistent headache (this is something that happens continually throughout), or start to see spots in my vision (which has been happening daily for the last eight weeks). You don't tell a hypochondriac this information...it just gives us too many possibilities. So right now, Jeff has confined me to bed rest. Also, he's banned all soda/caffeine. (And this, I assure you, will be the death of me). The problem is, though bed rest sounds great...I have two other kids that need to be taken to and from school. And helped with homework, and fed, and played with, and I already feel like a completely negligent mother. Also, I'm seriously going to go out of my mind.
So, Jeff is going to check with his HR rep. tomorrow. Hopefully, there may be a string that can be pulled or something....something that will establish his being there for three months, (which he has), and in some way get our insurance to kick in a few days sooner. If not, it's bed rest for me, which is really sad, because this means that Book club, and my weekend movie retreat that I have be PLANNING on for so long, looking forward to for so long, will have to go on without me. And then next week, I'll miss DATS...my heart hurts just thinking about it. While all are going on...I'll be in bed. Miserable and angry.
So I'm asking for some positive vibes to be sent this way. I'm hoping that some miracle will happen with the whole insurance process...and this way, I don't have to worry about my blood pressure spiking just because of worrying about this whole situation. Anyway, that is the update for now. Apparently peeing into a cup each time does do something--too bad it's biting me in the butt. I'll keep you informed.